I’m stuck. I’m not really sure what to write. This is just my expression of uneasiness.  It has nothing to do with anybody, but me myself. The first week of school has passed by. The feeling of uneasiness is still there. I could feel it slowly moves away. I hope by next week everything would be ok.

When the new year comes, suddenly it comes to my mind what is always stated by others the phrase “kubur kata mari, rumah kata pergi”.  At times when you’re now in the mid forties you cannot escape from that kind of feeling and thinking.  Some people say that life begin at forty. What does it mean and how does it affect ones own thought?  It relies on the way you handle your life.  Different people would have different scope in life.

What I hope at least in the mean time, I could control this chaotic, confusing phase so that it would’nt make thing worst.


3 thoughts on “reflection…

  1. Hello there,
    Apa khabar? Selamat tahun baru from me. It was wonderful to come across your blog. And, the fact that you’re actually thinking and reflecting about how this year is going to turn out for you – that’s how it should be. The beginning of introspection is the beginning of change. cliche as it may sound – the woman who thinks and reflects is the woman who progresses and touches lives.

    My view? Life begins at 20, 30, 40 , 50 or 60 – whatever the number, it’s still LIFE and one that must be led – along with its attendant doses of self-doubt, challenges, stressful situations and frustrations!

    The best way is the way you’re going about it – reflect, ponder, wonder but act righteously for the benefit of humanity with your own inner conscience guiding you. With God’s grace, we will all see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have been down many times in my life and I know what I am talking about. As you well know, sometimes we have to ‘sujud’ very low before we reach self-realization and real apprecaition of the bounty that God provides us.

    You have such beautiful children! Congratulations. they are blessed to have a mother like you.

    Do you know, due to poor health I opted out of teaching last year (june2010) but am getting much better now. I’ve found a new calling in my life – with people beginning to approach me and call me to come to their schools to give motivational talks to teachers and students. Last place I went? On the 31st Dec 2010, at Equatorial Hotel, I spoke to 70 teachers of MRSM Balik Pulau Penang. I enjoyed it so much!! I just adore teaching – it’s my passion and I want to convey it to young teachers – teach with your heart and dedication and you WILL make a difference. Such a sharing experience it was! And, I learned a lot too although the time to interact was far, far too short.

    Ok please take care. Give my regards to your family and continue blogging. yes, do e-mail me because I may lose track of you otherwise:

  2. nithya sidhhu : thank you 4 your response. I don’t believe that it’s really you. i’ve always read Your articles in the paper (the Star) and thanks they give me motivation, some ideas and a new hope in the career. Of course being a teacher has its up and down as it is in our life. I just wonder why after all these years, i still don’t feel like teaching is everything to me. maybe i’m not as strong as you are. Anyway, thanks once again 4 the response. It really cheered me up!

  3. Hi,
    Thank you for your response. I don’t believe it that an eminent figure like you is reading and commenting my blog. Sorry my english is not very good actually. I use the blog to share my feeling and thought while at the same time to polish my English. thanks for giving me hope and motivating me. I always keep abreast of your articles in the Star. Most of them are helpful, motivating and inspiring. From what you have commented I realise you’re very strong and resilient . I know life has its up and down. I hope sooner or later i’ll feel the same as your feeling about this career .. wish me luck.

    Thank you once again.

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